i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to sanitize my soul.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize