I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid