Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
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Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
