well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
