I'm really into asian looking animals
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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