I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
