and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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