Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
it glows. i had to have it.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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