is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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