Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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