Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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