420 ftw
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
