This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
