So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
