guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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