To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I just googled if crying burns calories
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
