Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize