I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
