kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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