Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
