My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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