I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
