i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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