He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
