Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
