I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
