I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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