i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person