Buhtt sex?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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