It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
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Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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