I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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