once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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