you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
