the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
