I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
