so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
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Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
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I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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