Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
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did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
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The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.