She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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