i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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