im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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