you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
