all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
