butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
