I want you more than these girls want KFC
he told me I talked like a deaf person
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize