Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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