SEEEEXXX PLEASE
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize