when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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