We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
