we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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