stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
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And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
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