so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
